


New Residents

by Azvee



Category: Hannibal (TV), Hannibal Lecter Series - All Media Types, Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Crack, Crossover, Fluff, Gen, M/M, Prompt Fill, Puppies, and it counts for bonus points, consists of multiple one shots, no ending or plot for the story, there is going to be a dinner date in here since I adore Cecil and Carlos, with the usual amount of fluff Cecil and Carlos bring
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-08-25
Updated: 2014-10-03
Packaged: 2017-12-24 11:51:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 14,454
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/939688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Azvee/pseuds/Azvee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Where the hell are we, Dr. Lecter?"</p>
<p>"Welcome, my dear Will, to Night Vale."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>In response to a kinkmeme fill where Hannibal and Will become the newest members of our favorite desert community. Fancy date with Cecil and perfect Carlos included because they are adorable.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Welcome the Night Vale

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, so I didn't think I would be posting much else on here, but I ran into a lovely prompt on the internet and was filled with a burning desire to fill it. A link will be included in the bottom notes.
> 
> Talking between people is something I'm trying to work on, so I figured a cracky idea was as good a place as any to start trying to improve.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will wakes up to find himself in a very strange place with the last person he ever wanted to see again.

The first thing Will noticed when he woke up was that he was handcuffed to a radiator. This realization was quickly followed by a pounding in his head that only seemed to get worse as time continued to crawl on. An experimental tug showed that neither the cuffs or the radiator was going anywhere soon, and Will really didn't want to break his thumb again. Looking around the room yielded no further help. The place was completely bare except for a few boxes and a closed door. How had he even gotten here? He couldn't remember much with the migraine punishing every attempt at thought. He'd been in his cell...and...and then what?

The sound of footsteps coming from outside the room halted any further attempts at solving this puzzle. The sound of the steps and a lock turning seemed unnaturally loud and Will closed his eyes in hopes of returning to blessed unconsciousness. Instead, he got a pill shoved in his mouth followed by a glass of water and a command to "Drink." The deep accented tone sounded vaguely familiar to Will, but he couldn't quite place it just yet. The water was more than welcome though, and the glass was quickly drained. The world seemed a bit less sharp as Will opened his eyes again and was greeted by the sight of a paisley tie. Now he remembered. With a groan, Will once again tried to render himself unconscious.

_He had been sitting in his cell when Will had heard the guard's running towards the doors at the end of the hall. He couldn't quite make out what was being said through the walls, but the voices sounded very loud and agitated. There was a single gunshot followed by the sound of a small explosion. Smoke started to curl under the doorway and invade the room. The door opened, and a figure appeared within the cloud of fog. Calmly ignoring the cries of the other inmates, the man made his way down the hall. Soon, Will was staring at a very familiar suit accompanied by some sort of gas mask. As a pair of keys was produced, had Will scrambled off his bed to prepare to fight. He hadn't moved fast enough and found his head being slammed into a wall instead. As darkness rushed to meet him, he thought he felt a strong pair of arms catch him as he fell._

"I apologize about the sudden departure, Will. Uncle Jack seemed against allowing me extra time to plan a proper getaway for the two of us. The penitentiary was truly doing you no favors." A silk handkerchief appeared to wipe Will's chin. "I had hoped to have the chance to prepare and explain things to you before leaving, but I have done the best I could under such circumstances." Hannibal turned his attention to the nearby boxes and began opening the first.

"You broke me out?" Will blurted out having finally found his voice again. "But, why? You're the reason I was put there to begin with!"

"True, but fate has deemed fit to prove your innocence despite my efforts." Hannibal paused his work to drape a blanket around Will's shoulders. He tried unsuccessfully to shrug it off. "Miss Lounds somehow heard your claims and decided to investigate. Her findings were...regrettable. So, I set about gathering anything of value and taking my leave. Normally, I would have chosen a more refined area to settle, but I believe this small town will do you good."

"Where the hell are we, Dr. Lecter?"

"Welcome, my dear Will, to Night Vale."

"I've never heard of anyplace called Night Vale before."

Grabbing the second box, Hannibal nodded in agreement before going to work on it's contents. "Not many have. It took me many hours and quite a few personal favors to learn of this place. It's a small desert community. Everyone so far has been very welcoming of us. The local radio host even came by to learn more about the two of us so that the town could better welcome us."

"Wait, someone came here and interviewed you? How long was I out?" Will tried to approximate the time in his head, but his mind still steadfastly refused to cooperate with him. It was becoming a recurring problem today.

"You have been resting for around two days now." Hannibal held up a hand to silence any outburst Will was about to have. "After you began to rouse from the blow to the head, I was forced to inject you with a cocktail of sleeping medications. Nothing that would have any long-term adverse effects, of course, but enough to ensure a trip without any other added delays."

"Delays? Me waking up an trying to escape counts as just a delay? You have just abducted me! Why would you even have taken me? There must have been easier targets to use as a hostage. I was stuck in a cell in a building full of armed men!"

"And now, you are a resident of Night Vale." Hannibal began to assemble the parts of the final box. "Surely that is a favorable change of pace to looking at your cell walls all day?" There was a brief pause as the final parts of the three boxes connected. An IKEA-esk foundation for a bed had been formed. "And please, do not call yourself a hostage. I have every confidence in my ability to evade the authorities. You are my friend Will, and I have missed our talks. I had been planning to remove you from Dr. Chilton's incompetency for some time now. It would be rude of me to leave you alone like to rest of your friends and coworkers did. Now, if you will excuse me, I'll be back with a mattress for you."

Will sat there for a moment silently debating if the benefits of breaking a thumb actually would out-weigh the pain that would be added to his already protesting mind. He settled for shaking the handcuffs again and mumbling about Hannibal's misuse of the word 'friend.' A low whistling sound distracted him from his thoughts. By craning his neck, Will was able to see out of a window in the next room. There he saw a mother and her child talking to what appeared to be a large cloud of constantly changing color. _'Great, now I'm hallucinating again.'_ Perhaps Hannibal had slipped something other than aspirin in his mouth when he was given that pill. The sound of footsteps returning brought about another rise of anger.

"What did you give me?"

To his credit, Hannibal didn't pause in his current mission to place the mattress while responding in an ever calm voice. "I am afraid you will need to be more specific, William."

"I just saw a woman outside talking to a giant glowing cloud! Now, tell me what the hell did you give me?"

"Oh, the Glow Cloud is a member of the school board here. It was probably just talking to another member of the board. Nothing to worry about. Now, I am going to take off your handcuffs, please try to behave yourself."

Any protest over whether or not to be concerned over the selection of school board members was effectively silenced by Hannibal's statement. "You honestly expect me to stay put once you uncuff me?" Will blurted out before he could stop himself. "You're a serial killer, and you want me to just stay with you? I am beginning to question your sanity, Doctor." The last word came out as a near hiss.

"Now, Will, there is no need for such malice in your voice. I saved you from a lifetime of being studied and wound up by every scientist and therapist hoping to make a name for themselves." Hannibal sat on his haunches in an attempt to catch the younger man's eyes. They remained steadfastly locked on his shoulder. With a sigh, Hannibal took a wrist in his hand and continued; ignoring the way Will flinched at the contact. "Besides, you would never be able to make it out of the town."

Only the sound of a soft click broke the silence that followed the statement. After a second click followed, Will spoke again. "Is that a threat?" He asked, hoping that his voice wouldn't betray the fear that had coiled around his heart. He truly didn't know the man in front of him at all, and that thought terrified him. Will couldn't tell why Hannibal had taken him or what his current plans were. The idea of not knowing when his life could very well hang in the balance was unnerving.

Hannibal rose to his feet and offered a hand to Will, who simply stared at it as if it could provide him with the answers he was seeking. "I would rather not harm you, but I will choose my own freedom over yours. However, Night Vale itself can be a very dangerous place to those who do not know it's oddities. If you attempt to leave, you could run into a pack of feral dogs, or perhaps be picked up by the secret police, or simply die in the desert wastes. If you attempt to contact the FBI, the various agencies that have every phone line tapped will no doubt enter the home and detain you with lethal force. If left unaccompanied, this town will most likely be your end."

"That seems like a bit of a pessimistic view of my situation."

"Not at all, you are no longer imprisoned and are once again safe in my care."

A bark of harsh laughter escaped Will. "Safe with you? I was never safe with you. I was locked up for murders you committed! You hid the fact that my brain was inflamed from me! Hell, I had a seizure in front of you and you still didn't tell me about my encephalitis! I bet you even knew that you were sending me into another serial killers hands when you told be about Tobias. Nothing about the time I spent with you was ever safe."

Pushing away the hand offered to him, Will rose to his feet on his own. The room began to spin, and he found himself quickly loosing his balance once again. Just before his face became acquainted with the nearest wall, those same strong arms from the cell once again steadied Will. The headache was increasing yet again, and the room began to blur. Hannibal began to speak again, but the words were unintelligible to Will. His legs gave out as he was guided out of the room and into another. The darkness he had been trying so hard to find earlier finally came. 

When things came back into focus, Will found himself resting on a couch that looked like it also belonged in an IKEA showroom. A washcloth was on his forehead and another glass of water had appeared on a packing box placed next to Will's head. Will ignored it in favor of trying to get into a better position to survey his new surroundings. This proved to be a bad idea, as the shifting of his body ended with him sitting up just in time to vomit onto the floor. His body was protesting too much to notice Hannibal's entrance into the room. He tutted to himself and reentered with several cleaning supplies and a few crackers.

"Eat these and you will feel better, William. Your stomach needs to digest something before your body can work the rest of the drugs out of your system." The crackers were placed near the glass of water while Hannibal set to work on the mess. "You missed a chance to meet the radio host, Cecil. He stopped by again to invite us out to dinner. I believe he was looking for a reason to invite another out to dine with him, but the gesture is appreciated none the less. I told him we would be happy to accept."

"Please don't talk so loud." Will managed to mumble between bites of a cracker. He did not feel like listening to Hannibal, but he really did not feel like vomiting either. So he took the lesser of the two evils and ate the crackers. "And why would you take your hostage out on a dinner date? That doesn't seem like a good way to keep me from escaping from here."

"I am speaking at the same volume as I always have, Will." Hannibal calmly replied without pausing in his current job. "I have already told you that you are not a hostage. This is simply the start of an indefinite vacation for you. The dinner seemed like a good opportunity for you to see where you will be spending the first part of that vacation."

"You know that most vacations are something that people voluntarily take part in, right?"

"But, you are not most people. Neither of us fits into what society would consider normal. Now, if you are feeling well enough, I would be happy to escort you to your new room. The furnishings are still very sparse as you will no doubt notice. Once the necessities have been taken care of, we can begin work on the aesthetics of the house."

With the vomit cleaned, Hannibal rose and offered Will his hand yet again. This time, Will managed to swallow his pride and take it, steadfastly refusing to acknowledge the grin that spread across Hannibal's face at the action. He couldn't ignore the fact that his legs were going to give out a second time without the help of a human sized crutch. Biting back a curse, Will leaned against Hannibal and was half-led, half-carried into the radiator room. "I'm not going to be around long enough to worry about how nice things look around here. As soon as I have a chance, I'm skipping town and finding Jack." 

"Well, you shall have ample opportunity to do so when we meet Cecil and his mysterious companion tomorrow." Hannibal responded without the slightest hint of worry in his voice. "You will have to forgive the lack of a place to store your clothing, but I did supply you with several outfits that I believe will suit you much better than your jumpsuit."

The room hadn't changed much in Will's time away from it. It now contained; one radiator, a bag containing several changes of clothes, and one cheap bed with what could only be described as the softest sheets that Will had ever felt in his life adorning the mattress. Other than that, the room was bare. Even though he wanted to feel anger at Hannibal for the numerous wrongs done against him, Will found all his arguments vanish for the time being the moment he was placed on the bed. Instead, he felt drained and a little guilty for wearing his dirty prison uniform while sitting on such nice bedding.

"You should rest, Will. The day is done, and it will help your body work through any lingering effects the drugs may have on your system." With that, Hannibal flicked off the light and wandered out into the main room leaving the door wide open. The siren song of sleep seemed to override the urge to run, and Will soon found himself drifting off while Hannibal tuned a radio. The last thing he heard before sleep claimed him was a soft voice drifting into the room.

"Goodnight, Night Vale. Goodnight."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed reading this. As the tags promised, there will be another chapter posted for the most epic of dinner dates. Also, I think Winston may show up as well.  
> Your comments make my day, share your thoughts with me if your heart so desires!
> 
> Original prompt: http://hannibalkink.dreamwidth.org/2676.html?thread=5302900
> 
> Also, I have zero medical knowledge, so I took all the creative liberties on drugs. Sorry to anyone who actually does research on such stuff before writing.


	2. Welcome to Gino's

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's dinner time at Gino's. Awkward dinner dates with cannibals are way too much fun to write.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, college eats up more time than I thought it would, big surprise. But I have managed to cobble together an awkward dinner for you to read.

Will was standing in the middle of what he assumed was a restaurant. A fairly high-end establishment if the furnishing were anything to judge by. Several tables were occupied by well dressed couples enjoying a night out on the town. On any other occasion, such a place would have been a welcome break from his usual meal plans. Today though, he would rather have been anywhere else. There were two problems with his current situation. One: he was standing next to a man who had framed him for murder and two: he had absolutely no recollection of ever entering the building. 

"Damn." His mumbled curse didn't fail to escape Hannibal's ears. He sent Will a look that hovered somewhere between concern and a reprimand for swearing in a public location. It also meant that he was expecting an explanation as well. Considering his current hostage status, Will didn't think he was in any sort of position to refuse to answer him.

"I think I lost time again."

"And what makes you think that, Will?"

"I don't remember how we got into this restaurant."

Hannibal seemed ready to launch into the role of therapist again, but was beaten to an explanation by another. "Oh, you don't need to worry about that. It's just part of the full Gino's experience. Pretty fancy, right?" A man wearing a purple sweater vest and glasses approached the two with a grin stretching across his face. "I'm glad you could both make it, this town can sometimes lead people down the wrong road. We usually don't find the bodies when that happens." He paused as if in deep thought. "Or the car even. But, that doesn't matter since you're here." He stuck a hand out towards Will, grin still firmly in place. Will just stared at it.

Hannibal, ever polite, simply shook the man's hand with a smile. "William, this is Cecil. He hosts one of the local radio shows." Looking past Cecil, he nodded briefly towards a dark skinned man in a lab coat. "Is this our final dinner guest for the night?"

Said man was currently preoccupied with a tablet and a map of the town and took no notice of the group. Cecil nodded excitedly. "Yes. That's Carlos. I just know that you'll like him, everyone does. He is perfect after all. I should probably introduce you both. Got to keep up Night Vale's friendly reputation up after all." He all but skipped over towards the table the scientist was sitting at and cleared his throat. "Carlos, these are Dr. Lecter and William."

The man looked up from his work to greet the pair. "Hello. Sorry that I'm a bit distracted right now. Three houses disappeared overnight, and I've been trying to find out where they went to."

"They disappeared?" Will asked hoping that he had heard wrong. "Houses can't do that though."

"It happens from time to time. Usually it just means that they're getting some new air-conditioner installed. The climate control is much more energy efficient wherever they go to." Carlos gave Will a sympathetic look as Cecil continued to babble on about how environmentally conscious the beings in some other pocket of reality must be. Eventually the waiter came around to collect orders. "I hope you don't mind that the menu is a bit smaller since the ban on wheat and wheat byproducts."

"Why would you ban...nevermind."

Orders were placed, and the waiter vanished through some invisible exit as Cecil turned his attention towards Hannibal. "Oh! I almost forgot. The barbecue that I mentioned earlier has actually been canceled. Sorry about that. Secret police have said no more cannibalism."

Will just about choked on the glass of water he was drinking. "Cannibalism! You eat people?" He jerked his head from Cecil's confused face to Hannibal's faintly amused one, unsure who he is accusing at the moment.

"Well, we aren't doing that anymore. So, I would not try to arrive an hour early for what will certainly not be a friendly neighborhood get-together with human meat on the menu." Cecil replied with a wink. "Yup, definitely don't turn up for your welcoming party."

Will found he had very little appetite when their food appeared. Despite his distress about the apparent cannibalism happening all over town, dinner was a pleasant affair. Cecil and Hannibal more than made up for the stilted conversation that Will and Carlos offered. Cecil did spend a large part of dinner staring at Carlos with such a love struck look while the man continued his work, Will was half expecting some cartoon hearts to appear above his head. Eventually, Cecil noticed Will's gaze on him and took it as an invitation to speak with him.

"You know," Cecil began while stabbing a mushroom, "I would have loved to have gotten an interview with you when I first showed up, but a believe you were handcuffed to a radiator at the time."

Once again Will almost choked on his drink. "Wait, you saw that I was handcuffed? Why didn't you do anything?"

A look of confusion crossed Cecil's face. "Should I have? I hate to judge alternative lifestyles."

"I was abducted! I'm being held against my will by a serial killer and apparent cannibal!"

"Well, there is DEFINITELY no cannibalism happening in Night Vale. So, there's no need to worry about that." He shot a Will a grin before digging into his mushroom while everyone at the table stared at him. "Is something wrong guys?"

Carlos slowly put a hand on his shoulder before responding. "Ummm, are you feeling alright, Cecil?"

"I feel fine. Why do you ask?"

"You seem to have just grown a second head."

"Oh."

Yet again, Will was dumbfounded. "That's all you have to say?"

"Well, what else is there to say?" One of the heads responded. "Perhaps it's all a part of some new dinning experience here." The other chimed in. "Gino's is a very cutting edge sort of place after all. They like to stay ahead of the curve."

"You're not in pain at all?" Carlos asked while cautiously prodding the base of Cecil's necks.

The pair of heads both blushed at the attention. "No, not at all. Sometimes these things just show up. Quite a few people report having a third eye appear and disappear regularly. Another head might actually be a good thing. I can finally catch up on some reading I've been meaning to do. I've got a lot of science scrolls waiting to be read at home."

"Why don't you spend the night at my lab instead." A pair of happy sighs were heard. "I'd just like to make sure you're ok. Maybe run a few tests to see if I can do anything to help you." A hum of approval was issued from one head while the other nodded quickly.

The rest of dinner passed with a surprising level of normalcy. Granted, the second head did lead to an increase in conversation. Cecil was very eager to tell Will and Hannibal about any and all the points of interest in the town. Everyone finished their meal and managed to successfully climb out the broken window. Eventually, the group found themselves outside in the parking lot preparing to go their separate directions.

"Well, I think I should take Cecil home. I'll try to get this second head problem solved." He cast a brief worried look towards the man sitting in his car. Both his heads smiled and waved at him. "Anyway, it was nice to meet some people from outside the town. If you have any problems, just call me. This place can be a bit overwhelming if you don't have anyone around to help you adjust."

"It was very nice to meet you as well. I have no doubt that Cecil will be just fine under your care." Hannibal offered a farewell handshake and then turned to escort Will back to their own car. "Did you enjoy dinner, Will?"

"Why are we here?" Will asked. Whatever game Hannibal had been playing with him had gone on far too long. "You never do something unless it's a part of some master plan. Now tell me, why are we here?"

"Tell me, Will, have you had any hallucinations or time loss that only effected yourself since arriving here?"

"No, but I think watching a man grow a second head more or less eliminates the need for hallucinations."

"Precisely. I thought you would appreciate an apology gift after your incarceration. Staying in this town for a few months is my gift to you."

"I don't think I understand."

"You and I are normal here, Will."

Will stopped walking as soon as he heard the word normal. He couldn't remember a time when someone had ever considered him normal. But here, with the Glow Cloud and homes that disappear for days at a time, he could be. Why would a few bouts of sleepwalking stand out in a town where cats levitated in restrooms? He could be just like everyone else for once in his life. But was that enough of a reason to stay with Hannibal?

"I guess we can stay here for a little while longer." He softly replied as he got into the car.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, now I am torn between adding some Winston into a third chapter or to leave it as is. I'll get back to you guys on that.
> 
> Thoughts? Comments? Concerns? Threats?
> 
> Leave me a message here or on my tumblr: http://azvee.tumblr.com/


	3. What Dog Park?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will learns that some places in Night Vale are better left as mysteries.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have now added a Winston to the group, everything is better with Winston around.
> 
> Also, I apologize for hitting you with a bag of sad. It snuck up on me.

"Will, I have a surprise waiting for you on the porch." Hannibal's accented voice rang through the small house to find Will. Will put the finishing touches on a lure that he was making for one of their neighbors. He thought it a bit odd that people would want fishing equipment in the desert, but had learned not to question such things over the last three weeks. Things had fallen into place much better than Will was comfortable admitting. Despite being whisked away by a cannibalistic serial killer to the most bizarre town he had ever come across, Will found that he was actually enjoying himself more than he had in a long time.

Getting up from the table, Will wandered to the front of their house. He'd given up the idea of calling it Hannibal's after he spent the first week helping the man arrange everything in it. He'd also given up on seeing himself as a hostage, since he was welcome to come and go any time he pleased. Whatever surprise awaited Will at the door was no doubt another attempt to bribe him into staying longer. That was the reason he suddenly found himself in possession of a fishing rod and lure kit in the middle of a sea of sand.

He met Hannibal at the door, and tried to ignore his cheshire cat grin. Will thought that sometimes Hannibal got more out of this gift giving than Will did. Today though, he definitely enjoyed getting this gift as a pair of paws jumped up at Will the moment he opened the door. "Winston?" Will soon found himself kneeling and running his hands through the dog's fur and he was covered in sloppy kisses and stray fur. "But, I thought Alana was watching my dogs. How'd you manage to get Winston here?"

"An old patient of mine used to dabble in theft as a past time. When I contacted her, I found that it was still a hobby of hers. Winston was payment for my continued silence about her activities."

"Aren't you worried about getting hair on the furniture?"

If anything, Hannibal's grin widened. "Hardly. There is no piece of furniture in this house worthy of my concern." Hannibal had made a point of regularly expressing his disdain for the cheap tables and chairs that he was forced to use. Apparently, if it didn't have three or four zeros on the end of the price tag, it was beneath him. "I would request that you keep him out of my room. I'd like to keep the hair on my suits to a bare minimum."

"That's fair." Will honesty would have agreed to carry the dog everywhere at this point if Hannibal asked. As long as he got to keep Winston. "I think I'll take Winston for a tour of the town if that's alright with you."

"You don't need to ask permission to go, Will. You know that." Hannibal handed off a leash before heading back indoors, no doubt planning his next attempt at bribery. Whatever he came up with wouldn't matter though, nothing could top having one of Will's dogs returned to him. They were his family and Will had given up ever seeing them again. He was honestly surprised he hadn't cried upon seeing Winston.

The neighborhood passed by the pair in the brightness of the afternoon sun. Birds were barked at, strangers were sniffed, and trees were claimed. Will couldn't remember a time he felt this great. He could finally go out without worrying about be labeled a freak or an outcast. When some of your neighbors float, it's hard to single out people. These thoughts were what carried Will off into a part of town he hadn't explored yet. The streets seemed less crowded here, and people started walking faster when they got near what looked like a small park.

No one had told Will they had a park in the town. There appeared to be a large imposing metal fence around it, but there had to be an entrance somewhere. Urging Winston forward, Will began to walk the perimeter of the park. It seemed a bit colder nearer the metal spikes, but it was probably just the shade from the trees. Eventually, Will saw what he was looking for. A large gate stood in the center of the fence with a loose chain wrapped around the handles. As he got closer, Will noticed that the chain wasn't actually locked, and seemed to be placed there symbolically. A sign declaring the place forbidden was hanging above the chains. Will didn't pay any attention to it, lots of things were Forbidden in Night Vale. He still didn't understand why you couldn't use pencils or pens here. The park was probably closed for no real reason other than the council wanted to close something.

Right as he was about to take off the unlocked lock, Will heard a person rapidly approaching yelling, "No no no no no!" He turned just in time to get tackled by Cecil. "What," pant "what are you doing?" Winston ran around the pair barking. They were both effectively trapped within the leash at this point.

"What am I doing? You just ran into me!"

"You can't...can't go into the dog park." Cecil had either ran several blocks at a dead sprint, or he didn't exercise much. Will chose not to ask about that and settled for trying to get the man off his chest. "Didn't you see the sign?"

Will didn't reply until he had managed to free them both from Winston's leash. "Yeah, but it's just a park. It doesn't look dangerous."

"Well the park isn't really the problem." The trees on the other side of the fence rustled. Cecil cast a worried glance at the branches before turning to Will. "Can we talk about this somewhere else?"

"Fine, where do you want to go?"

A grin came across the radio host's face. "I know the perfect place."

 

 

"Why am I not surprised?" Will was now sitting in a very cramped apartment full of beakers and stacks of research that had yet to be properly filed. Cecil had taken them to what he had said the was 'best place in Night Vale' to answer his questions. At least the building was only a few blocks from the park. Will had a feeling that Cecil would have made them walk to the other end of town if it meant getting to see Carlos.

Said scientist was currently making up tea for the group while having a quiet but animated discussion with Cecil in the kitchen. Judging by the various hands waved in his direction, Will guessed he was the source of the argument. Eventually, Cecil lowered his arms in defeat and grabbed a cup of tea. Carlos took one in each hand and followed looked pleased to have won their debate.

"So," he said while handing off a mug to Will. "Cecil says that you wanted to know about the dog park."

"I would rather know why he had to tackle me into the ground."

Carlos chuckled before blowing on his mug. The smell of mint filled the room. "The two are related. You don't listen to the radio much, do you?"

"No...I've been a little preoccupied with other things." Will realized a little too late that he may have upset Cecil by saying that. "Sorry." He cast a look at the other man.

Cecil looked a bit like a particularly displeased cat at the moment. To be fair though, he'd looked like that since stepping out of the kitchen. "It's fine, Will. Not even Carlos listened to my show for a long time when he first got here. I really think you should give it a listen in the future. There's a lot of announcements that you should really hear."

"Cecil has made a few announcements about the dog park. It's really not a place you want to go."

"Why? Its just a dog park. A really nice looking one to." Will idly scratched at Winston's ear. He had thought that Carlos would take his side in all this. The scientist didn't seem to shy away from anything in the town. "Shouldn't you be investigating it?"

Carlos's face clouded over and looked away. "I did, or tried to at least. When I got here, the park was one of the first things I heard about. Cecil begged me not to go in there. At first, I didn't listen to him, but he was very persistent. I promised to stay away from there. The rest of my team didn't make that promise." He paused and looked into his drink as if it were replaying the memories in front of him. "Two other members decided to sneak in after dark so that no one would see them and report to the police. They were just going to be gone for a few hours, just to see if anything worth looking at was in there. They never came back out." Another pause. "We did hear their screams though. They made a sound that normal people should never make. I'll never forget it."

No one spoke for a while after that. Nothing but the sound of Cecil humming softly while rubbing Carlos's shoulder was heard. Eventually, Carlos found Will's eyes again. "I think Cecil probably saved my life when he made me promise to stay away from the dog park. So, now I'll save yours. Promise me that you'll never go in there." He was suddenly off his stool and grasping Will's shoulders. A pair of haunted eyes held Will captive. "Promise to stay away."

Will couldn't do anything but agree. "I promise. It's alright, I won't go anywhere near the park." Carlos released Will just as quickly as he'd grabbed him. 

"Good. I know it seems odd, but some things here are better left unexplained." He retreated to the kitchen to get rid of his mug.

"Why don't you stay for dinner?" Cecil asked, cheery voice already coming back. Nothing seemed to keep him down for long as far as Will could tell. "We were going to try to make up some crustless quiche."

"That's ok. Hannibal would probably get upset if I skipped out on any of his cooking." Although it was true, Will really just wanted to find somewhere to hide away from everyone for a little while. He wanted to forget all about the dog park and whatever monsters were hiding there. He wanted to hide from the pain and regret that Carlos had burned into his soul. He just wanted the day to be over.

The walk back home seemed to take much longer than the walk away from the house had. Will unhooked Winston, removed his shoes, and made a beeline for his room. He fell onto the still impossibly soft covers and promptly curled into a ball. He was so tired that he didn't hear Hannibal's cry of distress, or the footsteps coming into his room.

"William, I thought I made it clear that your dog should not enter my room." His voice was tight, and his coat was full of fur. Any further complaints were cut short when he saw the state that Will was in. He took a seat on the edge of the bed and put a hand of Will's shoulder. "Are you hurt?" Will shook his head. "Do you wish to tell me what happened?" Will shook his head again. "Do you want me to leave?" Another shake of his head.

Hannibal spent the next few hours stroking Will's hair and murmuring promises that everything would be alright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, this started as a happy dog walk and then it decided to hit me with a bag full of Carlos survivor guilt. I swear that I'll try to come up with something happier next time!


	4. The Green-eyed Monster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cecil begins to worry that Will and Carlos may be becoming too close. The only solution is dragging Hannibal along to spy on the pair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this brainchild I owe to an idea from firesighn on tumblr talking about Will and Carlos forming a freaked out bond. My mind went to how Cecil would deal with such a development.

Today was looking to be another uneventful one for Dr. Lecter. Will had left shortly after breakfast with Winston, and would most likely not return until it was time for dinner. Eating together at the start and end of each day had been one of the only rules given to Will when they arrived in town. Life had taught Hannibal that a good meal always makes a person more agreeable. Plus, Will was one of those people that needed to be reminded to eat regularly.

Since he had the house to himself, Lecter decided to see how the rest of the world was doing. He produced a key to the small lock box that was kept under his bed. Hannibal kept any sort device that could contact the outside world within it. He hoped that at this point Will no longer had the desire to run off, but Hannibal was a cautious man by nature. It was why he was still outside of a jail cell. He grabbed his tablet and was going to check the latest Ripper update on the Tattler until someone started banging on his door.

With a slightly soured mood, Hannibal resealed his lock box and went to see who was at the door. He was greeted with the site of a very disheveled looking Cecil. If Hannibal had to guess, he would say that the man hadn't slept for a day or two, and obviously hadn't bothered to change outfits or shower either. The radio host looked past Hannibal into the rest of the house, obviously searching for something. Cecil didn't bother to acknowledge Dr. Lecter, something the man found extremely rude.

He cleared his throat. "Can I help you with something, Cecil?"

The man actually jumped a bit at the sound of Lecter's voice. "I'm sorry," worried eyes met calm ones, "I'm just looking for someone."

"I assume that would be Will. He has left for the day." Hannibal did not wish to deal with this man today. Not if he was expressing an interest in Will. That would be unfortunate for all parties involved.

"Oh no, this is bad...really bad." Cecil rubbed a hand across his face, forgetting about the glasses currently lodged there. "Did he say where he was going?"

"No." Hannibal really didn't have time for this.

That single word seemed to deflate Cecil entirely. He dropped to the ground outside the house and sat on the welcome mat. "I knew it! Carlos didn't want to admit it, but it has to be true." He met Hannibal's eyes filled with more intensity than had been expected. "How long?"

"I'm afraid I do not understand the question."

"How long has Will been seeing Carlos? I know they've spent a lot of time together lately, but I had thought Carlos was simply being polite. But he's not! Carlos is in love with Will and his curly hair and lovely eyes!" A sob came out of the man's mouth and Hannibal found himself not knowing what to do for the first time in years. Will was not seeing anyone romantically, certainly not a man already in a relationship. His moral code wouldn't allow for such things.

Eventually, Hannibal grabbed the fallen host's shoulders and led him into the kitchen. He sat the man in a chair and brought him a glass of water. "I am afraid that you are mistaken. Will harbors no romantic feelings for Carlos. I also doubt that Carlos would ever do something so crass as having an affair."

This seemed to anger Cecil instead of calming him. "No! They spend entire days together doing who knows what." The glass was slammed onto the counter. Hannibal was thankful for the first time that the cups were made of a cheap plastic and wouldn't break. "I know he's cheating...I know it."

"Do you have any proof?"

That made his pause before shaking his head. "No, but they are. What else would they be doing?" Suddenly, this body straightened and those wild eyes from the porch found Hannibal's again. "I know, we'll follow them and I'll prove that Carlos is in love with Will!" Before Hannibal could protest, he found himself being pushed out the door by hands with much more strength than a man like Cecil should have. He was promptly shoved into a small yellow slugbug and being handed a pair of binoculars.

"Why don't you simply ask Carlos about this?" The pavement began to fly by outside the window.

"I did, and Carlos just laughed and said I worried too much." A few sniffles were heard. "He probably thinks that I'm not smart enough to figure it out. Maybe I don't know as much about science as some other guys, but I'm still smart. I like smart things."

Hannibal found his earlier irritation morphing into that of amusement. "I do not believe you need worry about anything, but I will help you watch William and Carlos if you wish." This was going to be much more entertaining than reading whatever wild claims Miss Lounds may have posted about him.

"Really? That's great! I know just the place to start."

 

 

Maybe this wasn't going to be quite as enjoyable as Hannibal had first thought. He had imagined sitting in Cecil's car while the man watched Will and Carlos doing whatever it was they were doing across the street. Crawling through the dirt and getting scratched by bushes was not something that had come to mind. His suit was going to be ruined by such activities. "So, how long have you been following them?" Cecil made several shushing sounds and waved his arms frantically. He was busy peering through the bushes and scribbling notes down with a crayon. "I haven't been following them. Just asking residents to watch them and report anything that they happen to see to me. The news hasn't been good."

Hannibal decided to turn his attention to the 'couple' across the street. Will and Carlos were eating outside of the Arby's and having a very animated discussion. Hannibal couldn't make out what was being said, but both men seemed very engaged and enthusiastic about whatever the topic was. Will said something that made Carlos burst out laughing. Cecil whimpered. "Not good at all."

The rest of the day was spent trailing the pair. Thankfully, there was no more hiding in foliage after Carlos and Will exited the restaurant. They proceeded to stroll through the rest of the town, pausing at any landmarks that either Will or his dog found interesting. It seemed to Hannibal that they were simply taking Winston on an extended walk, but suggesting that to Cecil did nothing to ease the man's fears. He was merely shushed again and had a rather unattractive hat placed in his head.

"It's so they don't recognize us." Cecil explained as he held a newspaper up to his face. It had eye holes strategically cut through the paper so he could discreetly monitor the men without showing his face. Before Hannibal could argue against the effectiveness of such tactics, he was shoved into an alley. "I think they may have seen us!" Cecil hissed before dashing behind a dumpster and motioning for Hannibal to join him. He did not.

Instead he waited for Will and Carlos to cross the road and approach him. "Dr. Lecter, why are you wearing a fez?" Carlos asked as he glanced around the rest of the alleyway. "And, is Cecil still here?"

"I believe you will find him behind the dumpster."

Said man suddenly emerged from his hiding place trying his best to appear as if he were researching something. "Oh, hello Carlos! I didn't see you there. I was too busy doing science on this strange puddle here." He flashed Carlos what he hoped was a convincing grin.

The man sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "That's just rainwater, Cecil." The smile vanished. "Why are you following us?" Cecil didn't respond. "Wait, is this about all those questions you asked me last night?"

Cecil suddenly became very interested in his feet. "Oh, Carlos, I'm _sooo_ sorry for following you. I know I can't compete with someone as smart and funny and interesting as Will. It was really nice of you to pretend like you weren't in love, but I understand. You two will be very happy together, probably much more than you ever were with stupid, boring me." Cecil wrapped his arms around himself and turned to leave. He didn't get very far before Carlos grabbed his shoulder and pulled the man to his chest.

"Cecil, you're not dumb, and you are anything but boring. You are wrong though, I'm not breaking up with you and I still love you." Cecil attempted to interrupt him, but was promptly silenced by a kiss. "Will and I are just good friends. It's nice to have someone from outside of Night Vale to talk to about all the strange things that happen here." Another kiss. "I like Will, but I love you."

Cecil all but melted in Carlos's arms at his attention and words. "I'm sorry, it's just sometimes I don't think I deserve someone as amazing as you."

Carlos placed several kisses on Cecil's forehead. "I think that about you most days. Now, let's get you into some clean clothes, alright?"

The pair bid Will and Hannibal an awkward farewell after remembering that there were other people in the alley with them. Will couldn't help the smile that crept up on his face as he watched them leave holding each other's hand. He also couldn't help the laughter that escaped when he took in Hannibal's appearance. His normally spotless attire was now covered in dirt and leaves. The outfit was impossibly wrinkled and the its color clashed with the fez still on the doctor's head.

Hannibal frowned at Will's outburst. "What do you find so amusing, William?" His voice had turned to ice. "Please remember that I eat the rude before answering."

Will either didn't care about the threat or knew that Hannibal didn't intend to follow through on it. "I don't think I've ever seen you wear such dirty clothing. You've got mud and bird droppings all over your suit."

"I am burning this suit when I get home."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone has ideas for what should happen here, feel free to send me a note here or on my tumblr. I can't guarantee that I'll use it, but I will look at them all. I love other people's ideas.
> 
> http://azvee.tumblr.com/


	5. Interns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will finds a way to occupy himself while in town. Hannibal is not pleased.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! So I wrote a little thing about how Hannibal stole Will away. If you like creepy Hannibal and letters mocking Jack Crawford, you should give Dear Jack a read.

Hannibal was not happy. He had plans for the day that did not involve driving out to the radio station to look for Will. He had been looking at houses in Florence when Cecil's radio show show started playing. Hannibal had taken to listening to the program every time it aired. It provided him with many helpful tips for living in town, as well as helping him avoid several unpleasant deaths. Everything was going fine until Cecil decided to update his listeners on life at the station.

"It's that time of year again folks. The start of new internships for several of Night Vale's own has just started up today. Brave souls looking for real life reporting experience have joined the team at our radio station. Which is a good thing, since Ronny imploded yesterday and now no one knows how to get the copy machine to work. Our condolences once again go out to his family."

"As is tradition, I will now read off the list of new interns and volunteers, so that you know which families to send your sympathy cards to. Ashley Bartel,  Juan Criado, Jason Fritzwilliams, William Graham, Jordan Madaki, and Tiffany Wimmer. Welcome to the Night Vale Community Radio team one and all. I hope you learn much about yourselves, others, and the soul-crushing reality that is life while here."

Hannibal was on his feet and out the door before the announcement was done.

 

 

The station was bigger than he had imagined it would be. Thus, it took him longer than he would have liked to finally locate Will. The man was sitting at a cafeteria style table with several other people all dressed in red shirts. They all seemed to be engrossed in talking about some TV show while Will looked at some sort of manual. Clearing his throat, Hannibal addressed the group.

"Pardon me, but may I borrow William for a few moments?"

"He's kinda in the middle of something. Can it wait?" A young blonde replied without sparing Hannibal a glance. A frown marred Hannibal's face. The man was going to end up on his dinner table if he did not apologize for such rudeness.

Seeing the frown, and perhaps sensing the danger, Will got up from the table. "I'm sure the copy machine can wait a few more minutes,  Jason. I'll be right back."

Hannibal grabbed Will by the arm and pulled him into the nearest open room before locking the door behind them.  "What are you doing Will?"

Will adopted a look of confusion. "Trying to fix a copy machine?" His voice was laced with sarcasm. Hannibal was not amused by the tone Will was using.

"You know very well what I mean. Why are you interning at the radio station? Surely you are no longer a part of the age group required to do such things."

"Well, first I'd like to say that anyone can intern no matter how old they are. Also, I'm volunteering. I heard Cecil needed some help around here, so I thought I'd help out. Its not like I'm doing anything else with my time anyway."

"You are on a vacation, Will. The idea is to relax instead of working."

Will snorted at the statement. "You broke into jail and abducted me."

Hannibal honestly didn't know why Will kept bringing that fact up. The man looked much healthier since being removed from the Baltimore facilities. "That doesn't mean you shouldn't take the time to get some much needed mental rest."

He simply shrugged. "I get bored."

Hannibal rubbed his face. He knew Will would get tired of being stationary eventually, but he had hoped the oddities of the town would hold off the inevitable longer than they had. "I can get you a boat motor or more lure making kits." That drew a laugh out of Will.

"We're in the middle of a desert, Hannibal. The only reason I make lures is because people keep asking for them. God only knows why."

"You've got Winston to take care of now."

"I can't spend all my time taking care of Winston. He's smart enough to help himself most of the time." A pause. "Why are you so against me helping around the station anyway? I thought your therapist side would see this as a great chance for positive social interaction."

"We have been here for just over two months and no less than six interns have died in that time span. Cecil just mentioned one that imploded within the last few days."

Realization finally dawned on Will's face. Worry and concern did not though. "I heard about that, apparently he took someone else's sandwich out of the refrigerator and ate it. People are calling it 'cosmic justice.' It's odd, but I don't plan out stealing food from others."

"Will, this place is a death trap. You are not allowed to work here. We are leaving." Hannibal gripped Will's arm and started to lead him towards the door. Will didn't move and freed his arm instead.

"I thought you said this was a vacation. I should be allowed to do what I want while on vacation."

"I am afraid that walking into your death is one of the few things not permitted. Now, come along." Hannibal once again grabbed Will's arm and tried to pull him out of the room. Instead, the arm was jerked out of his grasp.

"No."

"What did you say?"

"No. I'm not leaving."

Hannibal narrowed his eyes. "Please don't be difficult, Will." His voice once again took on the icy quality that often made Will give into whatever demand Hannibal made.

Not this time though. Instead of capitulating, Will stared him down. "I may be staying in this crazy town with you, but that does not mean I'm bound to your every whim. I'm not an idiot, I won't get myself killed. But if you try and force me to leave here, I will make it my personal mission to get in contact with Jack Crawford. I'm sure he'd be _very_ concerned with learning your current location."

Hannibal was trapped. He wanted Will to remain safe with him, but the man also valued his freedom. He didn't hold any illusions about why Jack had not been alerted already. It was because Will had chosen not to make use of the many phones and computers around him in favor of the relative normalcy the town offered. He had to either let Will risk death or serious injury, or make Will into a captive. The second option would set back his plans for the man much longer than he was willing to allow.

"If any harm comes to you because of your work here, you will stop volunteering." His voice left no room for argument. But it didn't really matter, Will had won this fight.

"Alright. Now, if you'll excuse me, Jordan was trying to get me to come to the group's next Star Trek marathon." Will maneuvered around Hannibal and unlocked the door. He paused in the door frame and looked back before adding as an afterthought, "Oh, and if you kill Jason, I will let Winston loose in your bedroom and rearrange every item in the kitchen."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I'm more or less making this up as inspiration hits me. If you have any ideas as to what the heck should happen next, or just want to say hi, send me a comment here or on tumblr.
> 
> azvee.tumblr.com


	6. Infestation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hannibal finds his home overrun with pests that Will is reluctant to part with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guess who hasn't abandoned this thing yet?

The first thing that Hannibal noticed when he returned from his shopping trip was the front yard. The normally undisturbed carpet of green had several holes in it. Will had sworn that Winston was trained not to dig up yards, but Hannibal doubted that claim as he surveyed the damage. He'd have to have a talk with the man later tonight. The front of a house was a direct indicator of how organized the owners of it were. Such a display was unacceptable.

Before Hannibal could reach the door, he saw movement by the drawn curtains, and the front door was quickly opened and slammed shut. "Hey, Hannibal!" Will greeted him with an overly cheerful voice and a very fake smile plastered on his face. "You're home early! I thought you had some errands to run today." Catching the way the other man's eyes narrowed in suspicion, Will dropped his gaze towards Hannibal's shoes.

"I have finished my shopping for the day, William. Now, would you like to help me move carry these groceries inside?"

Will's eyes shot up. "No!" Catching himself, he leaned against the door and tried to regain a sense of calm. "I mean, it's such a nice day out, don't you want to enjoy the weather for a bit? The birds are singing, the sun is shining, the grass is-"

"Torn up by your dog's digging?" Hannibal interrupted. "This," he gestured towards the lawn, "is utterly unacceptable. I thought you said your dog was better trained than this."

Will bristled at the comment and crossed his arms. "Winston is trained and probably behaves better than most people do."

"Well, the front lawn and I must disagree with that opinion. Now, I really must insist that you move. I have perishables."

"I'd rather stay out here and talk."

"Will," Hannibal's eyes glinted with a barely concealed threat. "Either you stand aside, or I make you. Make your choice, but do not try my patience." Shoulders slumping and a slow shuffle away from the door brought a smile to Hannibal's face, any traces of malice gone. "Thank you."

Will started to speak as Hannibal began to open the door. "Before you open the door, I need to tell you some-" Whatever Will was about to say was drowned out by the sound of barking and several sets of paws scratching at the door and Hannibal's legs. A small sea of puppies from every dog breed imaginable poured out of the house and swarmed around the two men.

"Where did these dogs come from, William?" Hannibal's voice had an unnerving calm to it that set Will's nerves on fire.

For the first time since waking up cuffed to a radiator, Will found panic trying to wrap its fingers around him. He took a few steps back and held up hands in what he hoped was a placating gesture. "It wasn't me, I swear! I took Winston for a walk, and they were just kinda  _there_ when we got back." Hannibal face showed more than a little skepticism. "I'm not lying. Just ask Cecil if you don't believe me, he's talked about puppy 'infestations' on the show before." Will grimaced at the use of the term infestation. "I didn't know what to do. The poor little guys can't make it on their own out there, not in a town like this."

"We are not keeping them."

"Well, not  _all_ of them." Will replied, grabbing a nearby pup. "But some are actually really well-behaved already."

"No, Will. None of the dogs will be staying." Hannibal stated as he tried in vain to shoo away a pekingeses who smelled whatever food Hannibal had in his bag. "Do you remember what Cecil said was a good way to remedy an infestation like this?"

"There are exterminators." Will hugged the small wire fox terrier closer to his chest. "We can't call them."

Hannibal's expression softened just a bit when he heard of the town's solution to the problem. Calling an exterminator for the animals would be like killing children in Will's eyes. He sighed before asking, "Do you know how many there are?"

"I haven't been able to get an exact count, but I'd say somewhere in the high thirties or low forties. They don't like to sit still." As if to prove a point, the dog Will held tried to squirm out of his arms. "Easy there, Alexander, it's a bit of a drop."

"You named him?" That was never a good sign.

"I gave them all names." Setting the small dog back down, Will replaced it with a border collie that had been pawing at Hannibal's legs. "They didn't come with any, so someone had to. Isn't that right, Lizzy?" A yip and tale wag responded.

Alarm bells were going off in Hannibal's head. If Will had named them, he wasn't going to want to get rid of the creatures. Hannibal had sacrificed a great deal of personal comfort to see to it that Will felt more as ease around him, but he drew the line at this. "We are not keeping forty dogs, Will."

"I know, I know...it's but one or two couldn't hurt. They wouldn't cause any trouble." A crash from behind Will was heard. A bulldog and bloodhound were happily sniffing the remains of a broken plant pot. "Well...Lizzy wouldn't."

"I am not allowing any more animals into my home. I am going to call Cecil and ask for his help with this problem." Carefully stepping around the small circle of puppies hoping for a scrap of food, Hannibal began to work his way into the house. He was greeted by the site of several accidents on the floor and the stuffing of one of the couch cushions scattered everywhere. He heard Will trying in vain to call off the dogs in his way as he followed behind Hannibal.

"What are you going to say to him?" Will's voice was slightly higher pitched, obviously worried about the fate of his furry companions.

Setting the bag down on the counter, and out of the reach of any small mammals, Hannibal faced Will again. "I will inform Cecil that we have an abundance of free puppies all looking for good homes." Will visibly relaxed as the words.

"Are you sure we can't keep just one?" Will pleaded as the collie fell asleep in his arms. "Look at Lizzy, she hasn't done anything wrong. Please, just her?"

Hannibal ran a hand through his hair, it had been a long, hot day and he didn't want to fight right now. "Fine, but the rest must go."

Will sent a grin Hannibal's way, something he had been doing with increasing frequency since coming to town. "Thank you! Winston has missed having other dogs around, so this will really improve his mood." Hannibal couldn't help the slight upturn of his lips as he listened to Will babble about his dog. They really were more human than most people were to Will. "...and she wasn't one of the dogs that broke into your room."

"What?" The half-formed smile was gone. Ignoring whatever response Will started to give, Hannibal wandered towards the hallway that led to the bedrooms. He entered the hallway just in time to see a corgi and husky fighting over a pair of his pants. When he looked back into the kitchen, Will was no longer present. After making a mental note to extract vengeance on the man at a later date, Hannibal entered his room and chased away the half dozen poodles that had made a bed out of his favorite jacket.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are a lot of puppy infestations in Night Vale, it's a real problem.
> 
> Also, did you guys listen to the latest episode? I'm dying right now! Night Vale was supposed to be my happy thing, but now I'm worried about them.
> 
> If you want to chat about that, or anything else really, drop me a line in the comments or on tumblr.
> 
> azvee.tumblr.com


	7. Dinner Party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hannibal decides to throw a dinner party and Will is less than pleased.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, it is the 31 of March and class has been canceled due to a blizzard warning. Which means that I have time to look at all the half formed ideas for stories that have been floating around my computer!

“I don’t care what you have to say; we are not having a dinner party.”

Hannibal didn’t even pause at Will’s sudden outburst as he prepared the liver of what was once a living human being. “That doesn’t seem very neighborly, William. I thought you wanted to get to know those around you better.” He tossed some excess fat away before continuing his work. “And I would rather you send out some form of greeting before starting an argument. You haven’t told me how that poor intern managed to create an isolated black hole by the coffee machine.”

“We are not going to be talking about my day at the station like some old married couple, Hannibal.” Will shot back as he entered the kitchen and paced. “You just killed someone and are going to serve them to our neighbors! Doesn’t that strike you as a little wrong at all?”

Hannibal still refused to look up from the meat he was cutting. “This would not be the first act of cannibalism that took place here, nor would it be the last. We have both heard Cecil announce more than once that residents should stop barbecuing human flesh. If the repeat warnings and reprimands are to be believed, no one has any intention of stopping. We will simply be offering a higher class of dining for them.”

“We? I am not having any part of this!” Will yelled and threw his hands up for emphasis, causing a few loose hairs from the dogs to escape his clothing. Hannibal watched a strand fall near the liver before finally looking at Will and trying to usher him out of the room.

“I must request that you stay out of the kitchen while I prepare the food. It would not make for a very good presentation to have dog hair in the dish.”

Will resisted the attempts at getting him to move. “You want to serve our guests people and dog hair is what you’re going to get upset about?”

“So, we are having a dinner party now?”

“Well apparently you’ve already invited half the town without asking me first. It’s a little late to tell them we don’t want them over after all.”

“It would be terribly rude.” Hannibal answered sincerely.

Will let out a defeated sigh before leaving the room to sit with the dogs. “Well we wouldn’t want to be rude, that would make us hypocrites.” He ran a hand through Lizzy’s fur while considering whether to voice his next question or remain silent. Curiosity eventually won in the end though. “What did they do?”

“What did who do, Will?”

“You know what I’m asking. What did that person do to make you murder him or her?”

“Ah,” Hannibal replied as if he just understood what was being asked. “Mrs. Truvel. She was the reason that you are currently eating generic store brand bread instead of the Ezekiel Bread that I specifically requested that the grocery store order.”

“You killed her over bread? You don’t even eat store bread.”

“The bread is very healthy and helps provide many of the nutrients needed to keep one’s body functioning at optimum levels. I thought it would be a good way to help instill healthy eating habits with you.”

Will ran a hand through his hair and laughed. “So, you killed her because I don’t eat well?”

“She took the only remaining loaf of bread even after being told it was to be held for me. The fact that now you may end up lacking enough vitamin C simply compounded the insult.”

“You can’t kill a person over bread, Hannibal.”

“And what should I kill a person over then?” Hannibal asked with a ghost of a smile on his face.

“I’d say that abducting a person or maybe framing them for murder would be good reasons to think about it.”

Hannibal began to slice the liver into thin strips, not concerned by the thinly veiled threat in the slightest. “And yet you have not tried to murder me.”

“I said think about. Thinking about something doesn’t mean that it’ll happen, just that the idea is there.”

“And have you thought about killing me?”

Another laugh escaped Will. “If you have to ask that question, you are the lousiest psychiatrist I have ever met.”

“What stops you from acting on these thoughts?”

“That fact that I’d be dead before I managed to get out of Night Vale.” Will thought this was explanation enough, but elaborated when he felt Hannibal’s questioning gaze still resting on him. “You’ve obviously done a lot of research about the town before running off here. If it weren’t for you, I would have been dead at least a dozen times over at this point.”

“And if I had taken you elsewhere?”

“I’d have stabbed you the first chance I got.”

“Thank you for the honesty.” A silence fell back over the house for a while, each man content to leave the other to their respective hobby. Hannibal was just putting the finishing touches on the meat when Will reappeared in the kitchen. He’d grabbed Wiston and Lizzy and seemed about to embark on a walk. He hovered awkwardly for a few moments before gathering the courage to speak.

“Can you make me a salad?”

Hannibal sent a disapproving look towards Will. “I have gone to a great deal of trouble preparing this meat, Will. The polite thing to do would be to at least sample a piece first.”

“You and the rest of the town may be alright with cannibalism, but I’m not. Don’t ask me to do something I’ll hate myself for. Just watching you eat is going to be enough of an issue already.”

Will didn’t wait for a response before grabbing the door handle and escaping with the dogs leaving Hannibal to his thoughts. While the idea of having Will sit down and knowingly consume human flesh was a thought that Hannibal had been thinking about for many months; forcing Will to do so before he was willing to would only serve to create a rift between the pair. Hannibal had already made too many allowances to have them all amount to nothing in just a few hours time. Will had finally begun to rebuild the trust he once had in Hannibal and the man was not willing to lose that again so quickly.

Later that night, Will sat down to the fanciest looking salad he had ever seen. He didn’t say anything about it and spent the rest of the night trying to ignore the pleased look Hannibal had on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hurray for snow in (almost) April!
> 
> If you guys want to come pester me/see if I have died of hypothermia due to the weather, come bother me in the comments section or on tumblr.
> 
> azvee.tumblr.com


	8. Sky Gods and Centaurs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will finds that Hannibal has found meat even rarer than man to try out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I went to my first convention ever and found out they had a Night Vale panel there. Felt that in honor of the baby Glow Cloud I got from it I should post something here. Enjoy!

_And just a reminded that this week is our annual Sky God offering week. Every home should have their ritualistic sacrifice prepared and set out for our hopefully merciful Sky God. This isn’t a competition but, the bigger the offering, the better the blessing. Right now, it seems that Doctor Lecter is the man to beat this year. He managed to catch a centaur. Now, like I said, this isn’t a competition; but, if I were a Sky God, I would definitely be giving the lawn of a man that brought me a centaur more rain than the guy that got me a squirrel._

Will looked up from the book he was reading when he heard Hannibal’s name mentioned on air. He learned that more often than not, having your name featured in Cecil’s broadcasts tended to revolve around significant events. Killing a mythological creature certainly seemed like a sizeable accomplishment for any man, let alone the Chesapeake Ripper. Will was surprised that the man hadn’t already come back to his room to gloat. It was only a matter of time before it happened.

Will decided to take the initiative and left to find Hannibal instead of waiting for the Ripper to find him instead. Unsurprisingly, he found Hannibal in the kitchen, grabbing several skewers and knives. There was no body to be found in the kitchen though and Hannibal was either too focused  in his current task or was unwilling to acknowledge Will’s presence at the moment. He eventually cleared his throat before speaking in an attempt to get the man’s attention.

“You killed a centaur?”

“Yes.” Hannibal replied as he checked on the sharpness of a butcher’s knife.

“Why?”

“They’re always running through the pasta aisle at the store from some other plane of existence and knocking milk and eggs out of elderly shoppers’ hands. It’s quite rude.” After a few more moments of silence, Hannibal appeared satisfied with the conditions of all his assorted cutlery and gave his full attention to Will.

“And you’re really just going to leave such um, rare meat out for a Sky God?” Will asked skeptically. “Doesn’t seem like something you’d do.”

“I feel it is only proper to honor the traditions of where you live, regardless of personal beliefs.” Hannibal replied. “But, you are right, not all of the centaur will be left outside. How the offering is displayed is left up to the discretion of each individual.”

“Which means that if the Ripper wanted to take a few trophies before leaving an artistic offering for whatever deity Night Vale happens to follow, that would be acceptable.”

“Correct.”

Will paused for a moment before asking the question that had been on his mind since he heard the radio announcement. “I’m not sure if I really want to have an answer to this, but what pray tell will we be having for dinner then?”

A somewhat wicked grin filled Hannibal’s face before he opened the fridge. Inside were several sealed bags of various cuts of meat and a few organs as well. “Naturally, I took both of the lungs so we could each have one.”

“Well of course.”

“There are a few cuts of the flank and sections of the rib as well. And I took the liver.”

“No heart or brain for the good doctor?”

“I thought that it would be best to leave those to the Sky God on the off chance that the creature really does exist. Heart and brain seem to be staples of many deities and it seems proper to leave them behind.”

“That doesn’t answer the first question though; what’s for dinner?”

Hannibal sighed and looked slightly less pleased as he answered Will. “Unfortunately, it appears that the lung will need to be saved until tomorrow. Getting the offering properly prepared takes precedence at the moment.” He sounded disappointed that such a rare meal had to be put on hold and Will suddenly felt the need to cheer the serial killer up.

“Oddly enough, I think that the neighbors are going to be jealous.” Will paused before going on. “God this is a weird town.” He was thinking more of the irrational urge to comfort the man that had framed him for several murders and then stuck him in a cell to rot, something that would never have happened in any other town.

Hannibal appeared to have picked up on Will’s thought process as well, and replied in a much lighter mood. “It does have certain perks though.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come drop a line in the comments or tumblr since I am sleep deprived and not quite here mentally yet!


	9. A Visitor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A dog goes missing and Hannibal disposes of a threat.

“They did what?” Hannibal looked up from the roast he was preparing at the shocked tone from the other room. One of their neighbors had called and said that they needed to talk to Will. “That’s awful. No no, don’t worry about it. Yes, I’ll help out, I want to help. Of course. Yes…yeah. Ok, bye.”

Rapid footsteps brought a very frazzled looking Will into the kitchen where he began pacing in front of Hannibal. “They took Bernard!”

“Bernard?”

“The little bulldog, Bernard. They took him!”

“I’m going to need a little more information, Will.”

“Mrs. Smiess just called and told me that the Hooded Figures came by while she was walking Bernard and they just took him! The poor little guy’s trapped in the dogpark with those _things_!” The former profiler's pacing picked up speed as his mind began to imagine the many dangers that the pup could be in right now. Hannibal was decidedly less concerned over the animal's fate.

“And you want to get him back?”

“Of course I do. He must be terrified.”

Hannibal decided that now would not be the time to debate the intelligence levels of canines and chose to focus on the more pressing issue. “Tell me, how does one go about getting a dog back from the forbidden dogpark?”

“I don’t know, leave them an offering outside the entrance?”

"That sounds like a guess, not an answer."

"Well I have to do something."

"Haven't you already made a commitment to Carlos today?" Which was true, Will had volunteered to lend an extra pair of hands to Carlos and his team of scientists as they chased after some sort of sentient shade of blue that had been seen out in the desert.

"I'm sure he'd forgive me if I didn't come along with him."

"That's terribly rude, Will. Going over to assist your friend will make no difference in Bernard's safety." If the dog had been taken away by the strange creatures, Hannibal was certain that it's fate was sealed by now. Will didn't need to endanger himself for one lost mutt.

It seemed that Will shared the same opinion as well, though he wouldn't voice it. Instead his shoulders just slumped forward and he let out a defeated sigh. "I guess he'll still be in there when we get back." 

 

* * *

 

Shortly after Will had left to meet his friend, Hannibal turned on the radio. As much as he would have preferred classical music to the local news, it was always helpful to be up to date in the goings-on of a town as odd as the one they were hiding in. Cecil certainly never failed to bring interesting information to his audience.

“Listeners, a visitor to Night Vale just dropped by the studio with an important announcement. The man said he was from the FBI and he needs our help. Apparently a serial killer has taken up residence somewhere in Night Vale. Can you believe it? A serial killer in our little town! Isn’t it just so exciting?”

Hannibal put down the book he was reading after hearing the announcement. The FBI was here looking for him. If that man had gone down to the station, Will could very well have run into him somewhere in town. Their little game could already have drawn to a sudden close without his knowledge. Hannibal would be forced to go on the run again, but this time without Will. The thought didn’t sit well with him. Something would need to be done.

First though, Hannibal needed to know if Will had heard the announcement. He took out his phone and called Carlos. The man was much better at answering his calls then Will was. He picked up after the second ring. “Good afternoon, Carlos. I was wondering if Will was still with you.” Hannibal spoke in a carefully neutral voice. No need to cause unnecessary interest or concern from the scientist.

“Yeah, we’re just heading out into the desert now, so it could be a few hours before we get back in town. Did something happen?”

They hadn’t heard the radio broadcast then. That was good. “Oh no, just wanted to make sure you were both alright.”

Hannibal gave himself four hours. Four hours to locate and kill an FBI agent. How hard could that be in a town like this? 

 

* * *

 

Locating the man wasn’t that hard to do. All Hannibal needed to do was sit on a bench reading for ten minutes before he heard the sound of swearing and a gun’s safety being clicked off.

“Hannibal Lecter?” A nervous voice to the left of the bench asked.

Putting a bookmark in place, Hannibal set the book down and looked up. A young and slightly rotund man was staring at him with wide eyes and pointing a shaking gun at him. Disarming him would be a simply matter if Hannibal needed to do so. “Yes?”

“You are under arrest for murder."

“Am I now?”

“Yes!”

“Very well," Hannibal said as he raised his hands in the air. "I surrender peacefully.”

The agent almost dropped his gun in shock. “What? Really?”

“What else is there to do?" Hannibal reasoned while trying his hardest not to show his teeth to the obviously terrified man that wanted to take his freedom from him. "You clearly have the upper hand and I am in no position to argue with you.”

“That’s...yes, that’s right! Now come on, we need to get going.”

“And where is our end destination?” Hannibal calmly inquired as he got up from the bench causing the man to jump and take a cautious step back.

“That’s up to Jack Crawford and the courts to decide.”

“Well surely you wouldn’t leave without collecting William as well. I have no doubt that Jack misses him dearly.”

“Graham is still alive?” Disbelief colored the agent's tone.

“Alive and well, although I’m not sure where he is at the moment. Will does love to wander. Perhaps we should go looking for him.”

That made the short man pause. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“And why not? You have your gun and I am unarmed. There should be no problem keeping me in line, unless you don’t think yourself competent enough to do so.” A frown came down on the agent's face, clearly Hannibal had struck the correct nerve.

“I can watch you. Let’s go.” The man ordered in a firm voice before poking Hannibal with the gun. He resisted the urge to snap the fool's neck right there and did as he was told instead. Surely a member of the FBI deserved a more unique ending to his career. As Hannibal obediently walked in front of the man while he pointed his gun at him, a smile crept onto his face. This was going to be amusing. 

 

* * *

 

It shouldn’t be this hard to get rid of one man. This town was a deathtrap, yet the FBI agent was still alive and in one piece after three hours of taking him to the most dangerous areas Hannibal could think of. The library had been free of librarians, and the forest outside of town was surprisingly silent for once. No tiny civilizations attacked the pair and street cleaning day was still months away. Hannibal could have dismembered this fool in at least a dozen different ways at this point. He was beginning to wonder if that would have been the most prudent solution.

Hannibal was moving mostly on auto-pilot by now while his mind thought of which parts of the agent he could successfully extract within an hour's time and still be able to dispose of the body. He didn't even notice when his feet took him to a strangely deserted street lined with tall metal bars. He also failed to register the sounds of a dog barking just beyond the bars.

“Hey, did you hear that?” The agent, Ruthers according to his ID, asked as he forced Hannibal to come to a halt with a rough yank of his arm. That was going to ruin the fabric. “Sounded like a dog.”

The sound of a tiny animal yapping was heard again and both men turned their attention to the large iron bars separating them from what seemed to be a park.

“Well, we are outside the dog park.” Hannibal replied, an idea already forming in his mind. “William was complaining earlier that one had gone missing.”

“Mr. Graham did love his dogs.”

“Unfortunately the entrance is on the opposite side of us, the dog will probably be gone by then.” Hannibal had never been near the entrance, having heard enough warnings to stay away from the forbidden place. He’d only ever seen brief glances of it from within his car. He thought it had had solid walls every time he had driven past it, but that hardly mattered now.

“One sec, there’s an opening over here that I think I can squeeze through. Stay right here if you know what’s good for you.” The last order was added as an afterthought said while the agent was already slipping past the wide gaps in the barrier.

“I wouldn’t dream of running.” Hannibal replied as he watched the man enter into the park. A grin formed as the Ripper waited for the screams to start.

As the minutes ticked by with no sign of death, Hannibal began to worry. Why was this stranger immune to every danger this town held? He was down to under and hour of his allotted time and if the FBI agent didn’t die soon, Will was likely to return to town and then disposing of the intruder would be that much harder.

“Found the little guy!” Ruthers proudly declared as he reemerged from the unnaturally dark park. A tiny bulldog squirmed in the man’s arms looking very dissatisfied with being carried but otherwise in good health. “Crap, I can’t fit through with it. Here, hold the dog.”

The FBI agent seemed to be having a hard time repeating what he easily done just a few minutes ago. Hannibal reluctantly accepted the pup from the man and was rewarded with muddy paws and a small but rapidly increasing puddle of drool on his shoulder. Just as he began to contemplate the idea of simply dropping the little beast onto the ground and letting it fend for itself, Hannibal saw the one thing that was capable of making this situation worse. Will.

The man was currently climbing out of a van and waving farewell the the occupants within. Hannibal could just make out what Will was saying to the driver. “Thanks for letting me off here guys, I think I see Hannibal.” He wasn’t meant to be back for at least another hour. How was Hannibal meant to explain why he was now holding a suddenly slobbering dog while an FBI agent struggled to slip through the thick bars of a supposedly lethal dog park?

“Did these things get smaller?” That was a good question. Hannibal couldn’t recall the size of the gap before, but the bars were now clearly much too close together to allow anyone to slip more than an arm between them. Thinking more on it, Hannibal was certain that there were never any bars around the dog park. There was only ever a high impenetrable wall.

“I would suggest you remove your arm from the bars there if you wish to keep it, Agent Ruthers.” The Ripper stated while positioning himself so that Will would not be able to see the man trapped in the park. “I believe the wall around the dog park is reforming and I doubt you’ll want to be without a limb when the creatures within come for you.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Ruthers asked. He slid his arm back all the same though, and the bars resolidified into a wall, impossibly tall and too smooth to climb. A faint pounding could be heard from the other side as Will approached unaware of what had just happened.

“Hey, you found Bernard! Is he alright?” Will asked as he scratched the dog's chin.

“Mr. Graham, is that you?” A voice from beyond the wall asked.

Any joy over finding the lost dog was now replaced by concern for the stranger trapped behind the wall. “Is there someone inside there? Hey, are you alright?”

“Mr. Graham, I’m Paul Ruthers from the…” A pause. “I’m Paul Ruthers...sorry, but do you hear a clicking noise on your side?” Any reply that Will or Hannibal might have given was cut short as a scream was heard followed by strange hissing sounds and then silence. Will immediately locked eyes with Hannibal and the man once again regretted not killing the FBI agent from the beginning.

Unsure of what else to do, Hannibal shoved the slobbering bulldog into Will’s arms. “Please return this dog to it’s owner, I am not a fan of saliva.”

If anything, Will's death stare became even darker. “What did you do, Hannibal?”

“I believe I just solved your dog problem, Will.” Hannibal's excuse sounded pitiful even to him. Unfortunately, the serial killer's rare loss of confidence did nothing to calm the anger in Will.

“By locking a person in the dog park instead?”

“Well, it seemed like a good solution to a number of problems.”

“You know what?" He stated with a humorless laugh. "I’m spending the night with Cecil. If you want to run around being a sadist, you can do it without me around for company!” After one last glare at Hannibal, Will turned on his heel and left without giving the man a second glance or a chance to try and explain what had just happened.

Hannibal watched Will stalk away with anger radiating off him in waves. And today had looked so promising. Hannibal really hated the FBI.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why yes, I am alive and have chosen to add onto the only story of mine that has both no plot and no ending.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed reading this. As the tags promised, there will be another chapter posted for the most epic of dinner dates. Also, I think Winston may show up as well.  
> Your comments make my day, share your thoughts with me if your heart so desires!
> 
> Original prompt: http://hannibalkink.dreamwidth.org/2676.html?thread=5302900
> 
> Also, I have zero medical knowledge, so I took all the creative liberties on drugs. Sorry to anyone who actually does research on such stuff before writing.


End file.
